New Orleans and Las Vegas are two of the most sexually-oriented cities in America. These cities are brimming with sex and this paper isn’t trying to make a moral argument against these cities’ wild lifestyles. However, many of these images remain true to poker. This phenomenon might not be so harmful if it was evenly distributed between the sexes. However, all one sees are partially robed women advertising poker sites. To see a dozen bikini-clad women, all you have to do is log on to the internet and search “Women and Poker”.
Yours truly did actually run a search for “Women and Poker”, and these are some of the surprising results. We present 10 of the best poker sites online in no particular order.
-Pokerium Online Poker Room and casino: This website’s front page is an example of restraint and good taste. While many searches returned interesting results, this website was far ahead of them all. The home page shows an illustration of a brown-haired, scantily dressed vixen wearing a flower in her hair. This design was not created by real women. This drawing shows the woman inside a large Ace of Clubs. The middle of the card is where the woman is. A very large club lies in the middle. Its stem just happens to end in the middle of the woman’s crotch. We wouldn’t bet on this, even though there is the possibility of an unintentional innuendo.
Next on our list is the exquisitely delicious advertisement on hollywoodpoker.com about their “Babes & Bounties” tournament. The title should be enough to upset most female poker players. Next, the page features an image of a woman wearing a bikini top and money behind her. The site also claims that 12 of the most sexy poker hostesses will be at the table for players who don’t like the image in the middle. This is a good thing, as most serious poker players won’t play in tournaments that have less than eight sexy hostesses. To make sure one can see all the features, there is a picture showing a woman lying on her stomach in unsupportive underwear in front of a computer with poker chips around her body. So that she can be a model during poker games, she is wearing flattering white high-heeled shoes. This website is truly elegant.
-PokerWorld.com is an online card room that has been gaining popularity. This website is also tastefully designed and offers a new “Topless Bonus”. It seems like a stretch to call the “Topless Bonus: Shape of Things to Come” a promotion that will give you a 20% bonus to “top up” your account. It is not only a fraction of the 200% bonuses available on different sites, but it also offends. It is advertised with a tiny silhouette of a woman and hardly any other details. It is not clear why they decided to associate a 20% figure with topless women, but it was certainly done.
Jungle Poker also has its own female spokesperson: Cheynelle Fraser (a bartender/model) who is now the official face for Jungle Poker. It is hard to believe that a poker site would require a hot model to be its spokeswoman. It is likely that Cheynelle’s photos, which show a lot of her cleavage, have nothing to do with sexuality and everything to do with poker. The site may be using Cheynelle’s beautiful looks to promote their site. However, the front page features an advertisement for their Sit & Go tournaments. It includes two headshots of a man & woman fully dressed and challenging each other to a game of card. It’s a great day for equality!
Europeans are not the only ones who use attractive images of women to sell their products. A recent article on poker.gamble.co.uk describes the Great British Poker Tour. The article’s centerpiece image is of a nude woman in a tub full of poker chips. This picture is a great thing. Nothing says Great British Poker Tour like a nude woman in a tub full of poker chips.
-The most morbid result found during the search came from best-poker-rakeback.net on their rakeback advertisement, which features a frightening illustration of zombie woman in a corset, fishnet stockings, heels, and a short skirt using a rake to gather up some playing cards that must have fallen off a tree. We like the idea of someone literally raking cards, but we aren’t sure why they would need a beautiful undead woman.
Oddjack, a gambling blog, paid tribute to women in poker with an article entitled “Top 10 Sexiest Poker Women”. The four-part series is informative and reveals what their top ten list of the most sexiest poker women. We will only give you a glimpse of the three first women they discuss. Each picture has a caption underneath it. Courtney Friel is number ten, a television hostess who hosts the world poker tour. They have a picture of her in a lacy tanktop: it’s fine. The picture is clearly OK, considering that she was the model for it. The caption below the picure reads “Stop teasing Courtney, take those laces off!”
Evelyn Ng is the next featured profile. They placed a quote underneath her photo that said, “Evelyn sure …”.” Unfortunately, this comment is not sexual and they didn’t even attempt to be creative. In her profile, they also mentioned that Evelyn won the WPT Ladies Night and that “Yup, she kicked an ass.” Annie Duke and Kathy Liebert own the asses. Asses that I do not want to see any time soon. They don’t pay me enough to. This was a hilarious joke about two of the best female poker players.
Lily Elviro is number eight on their list. Lily Elviro is a very strong poker player. They used this picture of her from a tournament where she was playing poker. It shows her holding a pair. She leans forward slightly, showing some of her breasts. The comment below the photo states, “It’s difficult for Lily to carry a heavy set if puppies like that.” Without such amazing writing, most people would miss these hard-to-miss features.
Next on our list is Toby Bochan’s article on her poker blog. The photo-article is called “The hottest women in poker” and is an amateur gallery of professional femal players. This article features Evelyn Ng and Shannon Elizabeth as well as Clonie Gowen and Jennifer Tilly. Also, Isabelle Mercier and Cyndy Violette are featured. The most troubling thing about this gallery isn’t that the women are posting their photos, but that they didn’t use studio photographs. These photos look like they were taken with a secret digital camera. Is this creepy to anyone?
-Full Tilt Poker is last on our list. They recently challenged Clonie and Paris Hilton. They were absolutely right in their hearts: they planned to host a heads up challenge between the women, and the winner would receive $100,000 and donate it to her charity choice. It sounds great, but why is this on our trash list? You can see the two women in the photo on the website. Their “Sexy Stats” title is what they call their statistics. And just to ensure that the best poker player wins them added a “Who’s sexier?” The poll is at the bottom of this page.